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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23726032">Diverse Paces</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/eponine119/pseuds/eponine119'>eponine119</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Lost</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Everybody Dies, Gen, Time Travel</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 23:00:44</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,993</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23726032</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/eponine119/pseuds/eponine119</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>What if Locke didn't stop the record skipping?<br/>This is not a happy story. Character death. Diverges from season five. Title from Shakespeare: “Time travels in diverse paces with diverse persons.”</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Diverse Paces</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Diverse Paces<br/>
by eponine119<br/>
April 7 - 11, 2020</p><p>They're dying from time travel. </p><p>Dan's gone practically catatonic after Charlotte's death. He's only one who really knew what was going on – if he did, Sawyer thinks – but now he just keeps muttering about not telling someone something, and kind of rocking back and forth. Sawyer gives him a hard sidelong look but doesn't say anything. He won't pick on the defenseless. </p><p>The rest of them sit on the grass. Taking a break before deciding what to do next. Sawyer can't get Locke out of his head. One minute he's going down the well, the next minute and one flash later, it's dirt under their feet. Was he instantly surrounded by it? Did it crush him or did he drown in it, and which would be worse? </p><p>Could it happen to the rest of them, getting thrown millions of years into a future where the island's been built up or sank under water? </p><p>He's pretty sure he's the only one thinking about this, as he surveys the faces of his group. Miles, staring into space. Jin, staring into space and thinking about Sun. Juliet's got her head down, like the sun hurts her eyes. He knows she's thinking about something. And Dan. Rocking. Muttering. </p><p>“Shut it,” he says, unable to bear it another second. </p><p>“James,” Juliet says, and he sees her starting to draw herself up, to put her hand on his arm to restrain him should he attack further. Which he's not going to. But he's noticed she's always stepping up to call him by his stupid name and put her hand on his arm to try to calm him down. He's not real sure why. </p><p>He waves her off. </p><p>“Where... we go?” Jin asks. </p><p>“That's the question,” Sawyer says. </p><p>“Anywhere we go, we're starting over,” Juliet says. “Nothing's coming with us on the flashes. Wherever we settle, it'll be hard to make camp, and we'll have to keep starting over.” </p><p>“Caves,” Jin suggests. </p><p>The one place Sawyer never wanted to be. He thinks again of Locke and being encased in dirt. Like Han Solo in carbonite. But it's permanent shelter and there's water. </p><p>“People lived in those caves once,” Juliet says. </p><p>“People live all over this damn deserted island,” Sawyer counters, and shifts his shotgun. </p><p>“What's the alternative?” she asks. </p><p>“Beach. Orchid station and wait for it to show up. See if we can fix this.” </p><p>“Make up your mind already,” Miles says, and stretches out with his arm shielding his eyes from the sun. </p><p>Then the flash comes, noise and heat and light and vibration ringing through his skull. Interrupting the conversation and leaving them all gasping. Sawyer finds himself checking their faces, even as his head continues to throb as though it's been squeezed. He's hoping for no bloodied noses. But then he tastes it on his own lips and raises his hand to wipe it away. </p><p>Miles has a trickle and Juliet's holding her nose closed, head tipped forward slightly.  She lets it go and it gushes and Sawyer's stomach churns. </p><p>“Where's a tissue when you need one,” she says, and she sounds like she's crying. </p><p>Daniel produces a handkerchief out of his backpack and hands it to her. </p><p>“Figures,” Sawyer mutters and watches her. She mops things up and gets the bleeding stopped, then carefully folds up the rag and puts into her pocket. She gives him a look when she catches him watching. </p><p>“Charlotte was on the island the longest,” Miles says. </p><p>“Don't,” Juliet cautions. </p><p>“Then you, right? Years.” Miles looks at her. “Then these two. Months.” He double-points to Sawyer and Jin. “Then me and Dan. Days.” </p><p>Daniel's nose isn't bleeding; Miles's is. </p><p>“Enough,” Sawyer says. “It's just a theory. We don't know.” He gets up. “We're not gonna sit here takin' bets on who bites it next. We'll get to the caves and make a new plan.” He gives Juliet his hand to pull her up. Tries to ignore it shaking in his, and the way the blood dried into the lines of her fingers. </p><p>Everybody gets moving. Jin leads the way, then Miles. Daniel trails behind them, and Sawyer has to keep turning around to make sure they haven't lost him. </p><p>Juliet falls into step with Sawyer, as she has been during most of their treks. “I think he's right,” she says softly. </p><p>“Don't say that,” Sawyer snaps. “Could be anything. Dehydration.” He looks at her and he sees her trying not to be scared. “You're a doctor, the rest of it don't even make sense.” </p><p>“But time travel does?” </p><p>He has to let that one go. He's thinking about Locke again. Buried alive. Tries to think of a plan instead. But the harder he thinks, the less he's got, except the pounding of his head that matches the stomp of his feet on the ground. </p><p>Juliet starts to fall behind. She's not staggering like Charlotte was but she's not doing well. “Hold up,” Sawyer orders, remembering crossing this island shot and half-dead. He passes her his water bottle, his tongue playing over his hot, dry lips as he watches her finish it. </p><p>“You got this, Blondie,” he says. </p><p>“I'm fine,” she says with a wan smile. </p><p>Jin looks worried. Miles looks jealous of the attention. They keep walking, and reach the caves around nightfall. There's no way of telling when they are, but the caves are empty. </p><p>Sawyer tries to refill his water bottle casually, like he's not dying of thirst. Jin stakes out the spot where he and Sun had lived during their first days on the island. Miles wanders off, exploring. Juliet washes out the bloodstains from Daniel's handkerchief, like she's going to need it again. There hasn't been another flash. Not yet. </p><p>After checking to make sure Daniel caught up with them (he did), Sawyer goes to check on Miles and check things out in general. It'd just be their luck if this turned out to be polar bear village.</p><p>Miles is standing in one of the rooms of the caves. He seems oddly tense, looking around here and there like he's following a conversation no one else can hear. </p><p>“'m I interruptin' something?” Sawyer asks. </p><p>Miles looks at him. “This place really is death,” he says. “There's spirits everywhere.” </p><p>Sawyer sees the two bodies now, dessicated, lying on a ledge. Entwined together. Thinks he heard rumors about this when he was living on the beach. “What's their story?” he asks. </p><p>“You don't want to know, man,” Miles says. </p><p>“We can't bury them. They were here – later.” </p><p>“There are so many dead people on this island. We'll just be a few more,” Miles says. </p><p>“Ain't nobody dying on my watch.” </p><p>“Go talk to your girlfriend while you can,” Miles suggests. </p><p>Sawyer just gives him a look. No point in protesting. “Lemme know if your ghost friends tell you how to stop the flashes.” </p><p>He returns to the main chamber of the caves. He finds himself drawn to Juliet, but tells himself it's because Jin and Daniel aren't much for conversation. The mad scientist is still rocking and muttering to himself, with one hand in his hair as he pores over his diary. </p><p>Sawyer doesn't want to say something encouraging like, no flashes, because that'll just jinx them. So he nods at her to ask how she's doing without having to acknowledge there's a problem. She gives him that clear-eyed look that says she's okay. </p><p>He's thinking about dirt again. Lungs filling with it. He saw people killed by flaming arrows shot into the sky maybe a day ago – he's not sure why it's Locke in the well he can't stop thinking about. </p><p>Maybe because he should have been six feet under almost thirty years ago, and he's been living on borrowed time ever since.</p><p>“Where's Miles?” she asks. </p><p>“Talkin' to some ghosts. Sure hope they have some ideas.” </p><p>“We have to fix this,” she says. “It's the only way.” </p><p>“How do you propose we do that? They tell you about this in your Others training class?” </p><p>She shakes her head. “We're going to need food.” </p><p>“You hungry?” He can't remember the last time he ate. It's been hard, keeping track, with the flashes sending them day to night and back again. “I can do a convenience store run.” </p><p>“Bring me back some wine,” she suggests. </p><p>“I was thinking a slushie, but wine it is,” he promises. He looks her in the eye and he can tell her head still hurts. An impulse he can't fight drives him to touch her hair, ever so briefly, half-stroking and half-tousling. Then he's gone before she starts to smile. </p><p>What he needs to do is chop some wood to keep his mind and his body busy, but there's no signal fires to keep lit. So he picks fruit. After a couple of minutes of wishing he had a bag to carry them in, he takes off his shirt – Frogurt's shirt – and uses it. The trees aren't picked clean and it takes no effort to gather enough for five people. Jin can fish in the morning, but he's not sure what he can use as a net. Maybe some of these vines, Sawyer thinks, and realizes he's gone full Gilligan. </p><p>Back in the caves, he distributes the fruit and puts his shirt back on. Jin gives him a long look. Miles digs in hungrily. Daniel seems not to notice, tracing equations with his finger and probably wishing he had a pen. What Sawyer wouldn't do for his stash right about now. </p><p>Juliet's asleep and he decides not to wake her. He does watch her though, make sure she's just sleeping and not... anything else. </p><p>“Whatcha working on, Dan?” Miles asks. </p><p>“Maybe if we get off the island,” Daniel replies. </p><p>“You think that'll stop the flashes?” </p><p>“There's only a certain radius of the island's effects. Break free by following the right heading... but then we're the ones who're moving, not the island.” </p><p>“So then we'd be time traveling in the middle of the ocean?” Sawyer asks. </p><p>“Maybe. The calculations --” </p><p>“Screw the calculations, professor,” Sawyer snaps. </p><p>“It's the only way.” It takes a minute for him to realize that Daniel means the calculations are the only way. “Even if we could slow it down – the island can do the rest.” </p><p>“The rest what? You're a scientist talking about the damn island like it's a person.” </p><p>“The island can heal the damage done by time,” Daniel says. “It helped me.” </p><p>“Cause you're so normal,” Sawyer says. </p><p>“My memory – it was gone. From experimenting. I wasn't lost in time, I was just, lost. Since I've been here, it's been better. I've been better. You have no idea what it's like.” </p><p>“I ain't about to find out, which is why you need to figure out a way to stop all this.” </p><p>“The calculations,” Daniel says, but it must have been a complete sentence, because he goes quiet again. After a minute, he starts writing figures in the dust of the cave floor. He stretches out on his stomach, fingers still working. </p><p>Jin and Miles are both looking at Sawyer. He knows what they're looking for. Some kind of guidance or leadership. </p><p>Eating another mango, he thinks about Jack. What would Jack do if he was here. Give some long-ass inspirational speech and then take off into the jungle, probably with Kate at his heels, invited or not. Neither one of those things is an option. </p><p>He's not any kind of leader, but these people are willing to follow him. He feels responsible for them. He has to think of a plan to get them safe and keep them safe. </p><p>He leans against the cave wall, his shotgun within quick distance of his hand. He rests his hands on his thighs and closes his eyes. Not to sleep but to try to think, to envision how the hell he's going to take care of these people. Because he meant what he said. No one is dying on his watch. He'd figure something out. </p><p>He keeps coming back to the Orchid and the well, but he wants something else to present itself. Hell, maybe Daniel's idea would work, but to get off the island they'd need a boat. He knows how long it took to build the raft, and they don't have that kind of time. </p><p>Jin goes to sleep. So does Miles. Sawyer sits up, keeping the watch and listening to Daniel mumble to himself. Trying to think of a solution. </p><p>He's in the middle of a sexy dream when the next flash hits like an earthquake. It grinds into his bones and his teeth, ringing his ears and blinding him. The flash finally ends and he opens his eyes. The caves haven't changed. He thinks he heard a whimper, half-rousing him just before the flash started. His dream comes crashing back onto him as he remembers it. He was with Juliet in some kind of house, holding her, but her face was gray and bloody. </p><p>He's afraid to look at her now. </p><p>“The interval,” mutters Daniel, sent into a tizzy of new dirt-calculations. </p><p>Sawyer's eyes sweep to Jin, then Miles. They're okay. He rubs his own nose and it's clear. Something like relief floods into his chest and he dares to look at Juliet. </p><p>She's pulled up her knees and rested her head on them. She's looking up like she's praying. But her face is clean. </p><p>He shifts across the cave til he's next to her. His shotgun stays in his hand. “How's your head?” </p><p>“It hurts,” she says. </p><p>“You're not --” </p><p>“No,” she replies. “I'm okay, James.” She gives him a long look and he thinks guiltily about his dream again. But he believes her. So maybe they don't need to stop the flashes, maybe slowing them down would be good enough. Like Daniel said. </p><p>There's another flash and it's like the world spins off its axis for a second. Even when the light fades, Sawyer's dizzy and his stomach feels inside out. Looking at the ground, he realizes every time they flash, Daniel's calculations in the dirt are wiped out and he has to start over. </p><p>Blood from his nose drips into the dirt and he swipes it angrily with the back of his hand. His eyes sweep the cave, surveying the others. They're in similar condition. </p><p>“You need to go to the Orchid,” Sawyer orders Daniel, with his clean face and Charlotte's blood on his shirt. </p><p>“What?” Daniel asks. He sounds out of it, but he doesn't seem like his head hurts at all. </p><p>“You're not affected by the flashes. You've got the best chance. Go to the Orchid and fix this.” </p><p>“The wheel,” Daniel says, to himself. </p><p>“Yeah, the record, whatever. Go put a penny on the needle. The rest of us ain't got time.” </p><p>“I have to finish the calculations,” Daniel says. </p><p>Sawyer kicks the dirt away, and Daniel looks up at him. “I'm not askin' you, son.” His hand is menacing on his shotgun. </p><p>“James.” </p><p>“He's the only chance we got.” Sawyer doesn't turn to look at her. He's afraid to see. </p><p>Daniel puts his head down. Gathers his diary into his knapsack. Nods to Miles, who nods back. And then he leaves the caves. </p><p>Sawyer lets out a long sigh. Hoping he did the right thing. </p><p>“Anything could happen to him out there,” Juliet says, and she's angry. </p><p>“You better hope it doesn't.” He rounds on her, and sees she's already washed her face. “What're you so pissed about? You wanna die?” </p><p>She just blinks at him. Holding in her anger, but he can still see it on her face. In her eyes. </p><p>“Nobody's dying,” he proclaims. The horizon seems to wobble a little. “Jin's got the watch.” He surrenders his shotgun and sits down heavily, putting his arm over his eyes to block out the light. </p><p>After a minute, Juliet sits down next to him. </p><p>He's exhausted but her presence so close makes it impossible to relax. He's too aware of her there, and of his rapid pulse beating in his ears. With every breath he feels himself hoping there won't be another flash, afraid that there will be. Not knowing when it's coming is the hardest thing. </p><p>He must doze, because he's dreaming about dirt again. Of the ceiling of the caves swooping down on him, pressing him ever lower and closer to the floor until it threatens to crush him. His eyes pop open and he finds the ceiling at an acceptable height. But this was why he never wanted to live in the caves. The oppressive, closed-in feeling and the darkness of the shadows all around. </p><p>He has to go outside. He manages not to run, but just barely. Once he's free, with air all around him and nothing but the sky above, he can breathe again. </p><p>The scuff of her shoe behind him lets him know she's there. Feeling resigned, he turns and looks at her. She looks thin, and pale, with her hands on her hips and her hair glowing in the moonlight. “What,” he sighs. </p><p>She shakes her head. </p><p>“I couldn't breathe in there,” he said. </p><p>“I think the dreams aren't dreams. They're memories. Getting lost in time. Like...Charlotte did.” </p><p>“You're havin' 'em too.” </p><p>She nods. </p><p>He looks at her face. Really looks. “You're scared.” </p><p>“Aren't you?” Her voice rises at the end with held-back tears. </p><p>“C'mere.” He stretches out one hand. She hesitates, so he goes to her. Wraps her up in his arms, one hand on the back of her neck, pressing her head into his shoulder. He feels something like a broken sob go through her. Even though his lips are so close to her ear, he can't whisper it's all going to be okay. He figures everything since the crash has been borrowed time. Death's always been comin' for him. But she wasn't there. </p><p>And hell yes, maybe he is scared and it makes him feel better to be strong for somebody else. To hold another person in his arms and know he's not alone. He's been alone his whole life. So he just keeps holding her for all he's got. </p><p>Of course another damn flash hits, the pain of it driving her away from him. Her hands go to her ears and he bends forward because the flash hits him like a punch in the gut, trying to drive him down. The sounds of it keeps ringing in his ears even after the light is gone. </p><p>It's day again, who knows when. Juliet wipes her nose automatically now, and seeing her do it, he does the same. Jin appears at the entrance to the caves, and they both know it's Miles. </p><p>“He's hemorrhaging,” Juliet says. Jin's got Miles on his side so he won't choke on it, because there is so much blood. It's coming from his nose and his mouth and pooling in the dirt. </p><p>“I took the trash out, Ma. Like you said,” Miles says. His eyes are open but he's seeing something else. </p><p>Juliet kneels by his head but doesn't touch him. Sawyer can see she doesn't know what to do, doesn't even know where to start. </p><p>“I didn't mean to,” Miles says. </p><p>Juliet puts her hand on his head. He's shaking now. Small tremors give way to bigger ones. A seizure. </p><p>Sawyer turns away and listens to the horrific breathing turn to silence. He feels like there's a cold hand between his shoulder blades. </p><p>“He's gone,” Juliet says, unnecessarily. She gets to her feet. </p><p>Sawyer walks back out of the cave. He finds something that'll work as a shovel and he starts digging. He knows they could just wait for the next flash, that the bodies don't come with. But he can't. He has to do something and this is all he has. </p><p>There's another flash anyway and he doesn't need to dig anymore. </p><p>He trudges back into the caves. Miles is gone. Jin rests his head in his hands. Juliet is washing clean hands in the water and doesn't look like she's going to stop. </p><p>“I'm going after Daniel,” Sawyer announces. His shotgun is where he left it, so he shoulders it. </p><p>“Stop,” Juliet says. </p><p>“Anything could have happened to him. I gotta stop this thing.” </p><p>“You can't stop it, James,” she says. “You need to make peace with it.” </p><p>“I'm not doing it for me,” he tells her. Looking at Jin and then looking her in the eyes. </p><p>“Stay,” she says. </p><p>“Stop givin' up,” he orders her. </p><p>“Animals, when they're close to death, they go to find a place to be alone. You don't – stay here, James,” she says. “Stay with us.” She looks at Jin. Jin's brown eyes are fixed on Sawyer, and he's so pale you can see his freckles. He nods. </p><p>Sawyer sighs and lets the gun slip down from his shoulder. Then he sits down on his knees and puts his head into his hands. Lets it hurt. </p><p>Three flashes in a row leave them all reeling. Drifting. Jin's talking in Korean. “I don't want to move again,” Juliet says. Sawyer opens his eyes and sees the guys who threatened his life when he was nineteen. He blinks again and they're gone. He sighs, and hopes three flashes in a row is enough to get it out of the island's system for awhile, that they can rest. </p><p>“Why do you have to get divorced,” Juliet says, and he realizes she's still out of it. He looks at Jin, whose eyes are closed, but he's quiet. Sawyer crawls over to her. She's crying over some long-ago hurt and there's a trickle of blood around the curve of her ear. He feels sick. He licks his thumb to wipe it away. </p><p>The flash hits then and seems to go on for minutes. “Ow,” he says, when he can open his eyes again. </p><p>Then he sees it. Blood, everywhere. His hands are shaking as he reaches for her. “James,” she says, looking at him. Only one of her eyes opens, and her pupil's blown. “Felt like something broke loose. Inside my head.”</p><p>She moves awkwardly, trying to crawl into his lap. He wraps his arms around her and rocks her a little bit. “Won't be long now,” she whispers.</p><p>“No,” he says. “You fight this.” </p><p>“This church is so beautiful,” she says, and he thinks she's seeing something else. But she touches his lips with her hand and he knows she's seeing him. He squeezes her closer, and keeps holding her until the next flash takes her away. </p><p>When she's gone, he tells himself he would have held anyone like that. He's lying and doesn't even care. The light hurts his eyes all the time now, even the dim firelit torches here in the caves. He fills a water bottle and takes it to Jin, who only manages a swallow. He doesn't remember any English now. Sawyer hopes he's with Sun in whatever memory keeps firing in his brain, and tries to get him to drink a little more. </p><p>Another couple of flashes and he's alone. </p><p>He's always been alone. </p><p>He doesn't understand why he's still here. He does see them, sometimes, through the filmy light of the flashes. His mother, Cassidy, Kate, whatshisname... he's starting to forget, even as he relives it. </p><p>He doesn't know what to do. Staying and waiting for it has never been his way. So he balances up on his boots and takes one step after the other. Thinking he'll find the Orchid station. Figure out how to put time's wheel back in place. Maybe he can turn it backward. Stop any of this from ever happening. Stop the plane from falling out of the sky. Stop himself... stop his daddy... stop everything. </p><p>And then everything stops. It's silent all around him, and he waits to feel himself fall. </p><p>(end)</p>
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